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Compassion Awakened by Tornadoes

Mitch Arnold • May 14, 2024

Midwesterners are aware of the devastating potential of tornadoes, but we don’t live our lives with one eye on the sky. In fact, we don’t worry too much at all about them, even when the weather is favorable for their appearance. When they happen, however, they remind us of our vulnerability. My recent experience also reminded me of the importance of compassion.


The forecast three Fridays ago told us that tornadoes could emerge from the strong storms forecast to begin in my area in the mid- to late-afternoon. That’s not uncommon around here for this time of year, so I made a mental note of the threat and went on with my day. I was working from my home office when the first alert appeared on my phone at about 3 pm. I could see clouds to the south and west, but nothing appeared ominous. Then, the siren sounded.


We hear sirens two or three times every year. Usually, that means that a tornado warning has been issued for the county, but it doesn’t always mean that there is a storm in our part of the county. Normally, I explain that to my wife, while she argues with me to hide in the basement. Lynda was at work 30 miles away, so I didn’t have that argument. Instead, I turned on the television and saw that the storm could possibly be headed in my direction, though there hadn’t been a visual confirmation of a tornado. Ironically, the sirens then stopped, so I went out on my patio to get a closer look at the clouds. The clouds didn’t look any worse than they had a few minutes earlier. In fact, I saw golfers on the tee box, continuing their rounds.


When the sirens sounded a second time, just a few minutes later, I decided to pay closer attention to the television. I was steps away from the safe room in my basement, and my cell phone was in my pocket, in case I needed to scurry away to safety. Instead, I saw live footage of a massive tornado on the ground about five miles to the northwest and heading away from me. Since my house and I were safe, at least for the moment, my thoughts drifted to friends and family in the path of the storm.


It's amazing how quickly the human spirit can leave self-absorption and find compassion, when a threat is removed. Minutes earlier, I was preoccupied with thoughts of what I would do if my home was severely damaged or destroyed. Now, I was thinking of others facing that same threat. That realization made me think of how many of us, myself included, live that way every day. We get so consumed with everything that’s going in our lives that we often forget to consider others. That’s not an indictment of character; it’s simply the human condition.


The challenge is to be compassionate while still attending to our needs, and it’s a challenge I face almost every time I board a flight. Moving around in the tight quarters of an airplane is difficult for me, as is getting in and out of those seats. Plus, going down the taxiway takes me longer, so I pre-board whenever possible. Typically, there are three to as many as ten of us doing the same thing – all of us hoping for an uneventful boarding and convenient seatings. As I wait with this group, I survey the competition, trying to determine who needs the front row seats more than I do. When I board, I try to leave the best seats for those who appear to need them the most. That’s obviously an inexact science, and I’ve missed before, but I try to balance compassion with my own needs.



I need to get better doing the same thing away from the airport, and my experience with the tornado reminded me of that. Apparently, a lot of people had a similar awakening, as volunteers almost overwhelmed the coordinators responding to the storm. Driven by compassion awakened by the tornadoes, strangers from all over showed up for the unpleasant work of cleaning up from a storm, and they continued for weeks afterward. While it’s affirming that compassion is so abundant within us, let’s not wait for a tornado to share it.

By Mitch Arnold March 2, 2025
Nebraskans experienced what seemed like an entire winter in two weeks last month. Those, like me, who have been around for decades of Nebraska winters recognize that winter can be much harsher and last a lot longer, but for those two weeks, winter misery prevailed.  Then, it suddenly changed. In just a few days, we went from sub-zero overnight temperatures to temperatures in the sixties. Many areas experienced 70-plus temperature changes from one week to the next. The change was remarkable, and it not only melted the snow and ice, it also quickly erased our memories of the misery we felt just days before. Life is often like that. We can get so bogged down in difficult times that we can’t even imagine brighter days. Then, when brighter days happen, our memories mercifully tamp out the misery. The challenge is to resist unhappiness and frustration during trying times, and to remind ourselves that brighter days are ahead. It’s an exercise in hope, and one that’s crucial to our happiness, especially when things are not working out the way that we want them to. Amid the miserable weather of those two weeks, while the snow and ice kept me homebound, I slipped and fell when getting out of the shower. That left me with a diagonal slash across my back, sprained finger and deep bruising on my right hip and foot. Fortunately, no emergency room visit was needed this time, and I was able to continue on with my day and week, albeit much sorer and slower than usual. The worst of the injuries happened to my already weak right side, and resulted in that leg being much tighter than it normally is, which made getting around even more challenging than it already was. As always, I don’t share these challenges looking for sympathy. Rather, I want to acknowledge the occasional suffering that happens behind the scenes for all of us. Most of us try to put on a brave face and keep our problems behind closed doors, but everyone endures tough times at one time or another. It’s during those times that we need to find hope and optimism, and the best way to find hope and optimism is to focus on brighter days ahead. Like the weather, our fortunes can quickly change. I focused on that as ice and injury kept me homebound. I’ve been injured before and stuck at home by weather before, but rarely at the same time. In fact, the timing was quite convenient. Since the weather was already keeping me in, I could use that time to heal. Admittedly, those days were not without frustration and sadness, but I fought off those feelings with hope and optimism. Hope and optimism are almost always more elusive during difficult times, when we need them the most. That’s why we must make a concerted effort to summon them. If we don’t, we risk unnecessarily prolonging misery. As the weather improved, so did my body, like it had hundreds of times before. Before long, I was back doing the things I normally do, and my confidence level inched forward, as I proved to myself that I could survive another challenge and the brighter days I imagined came to be. If you are going through a difficult time, remind yourself that tough times never last, and that brighter days are ahead. If you do that enough, it becomes a defense mechanism that you can refine and use each time your days darken.
By Mitch Arnold January 5, 2025
Driving to the gym the other day, I caught myself thinking about a former client who inexplicably quit returning my calls. That led me to thinking about a former employee who started a competing business, which led me to thinking about an ex-girlfriend who broke my heart more than 30 years ago. In just a couple of minutes, my mind was swirling with negative thoughts about people who have let me down. Why?!? What good was any of that doing for me? One small, negative thought had sparked an inferno which threatened to obliterate any positivity lurking in my mind. I had a choice to make – change what I was thinking about or risk ruining my day, or at least part of it. That was obviously a pretty easy choice, but there was a time when it wouldn’t have been. I would have ceded my day to whatever thoughts crossed my mind. That was before I learned about the power of mindfulness. At its most basic, mindfulness is simply being aware of what you are thinking about in the moment. Mindfulness becomes more advanced when it’s used as part of a mental process to evaluate those thoughts and control them for psychological benefit. It is particularly useful when your mind grabs hold of negative thoughts and refuses to let go. In my experience, negative thoughts are insidious, opportunistic, and often more aggressive than positive thoughts. They will catch you in a moment of weakness, and quickly amplify before you are even aware of what they are doing. Whereas positive thoughts seem fleeting and easily lost, negative thoughts can be direct, intense and sometimes difficult to shake. If left uncontrolled, negative thoughts seem to multiply and intensify, like a relentless virus. They will squash your inner peace, kill your enthusiasm and sap your energy. That’s where mindfulness comes in. You can’t control negative thinking until you become aware of its presence in your mind, and we’re often unaware of it. We might just feel depressed or irritable, and point the finger at external circumstances, when our thoughts are really to blame. When we catch ourselves feeling that way, we should take a minute to consider what’s on our minds and if those thoughts merit the energy we’re devoting to them. In my case, with the unresponsive client, I had already examined the possible causes of the lack of responsiveness, and had come to peace with the reality that I’ll probably never know the reason. I had also reassured myself that I had done nothing wrong, so why devote any more energy to the situation? The thoughts about the former employee and ex-girlfriend were similar; I had already given them enough of my energy, and thinking about them was going to bring me nothing but negativity. Now aware that negative thoughts were flooding my mind, I focused on getting rid of them and replacing them with positive thoughts. I looked through my windshield at the unseasonably warm winter weather, and was purposefully grateful for the opportunity to be on my way to the gym for the exercise my body needed. I thought of the good things in my life, like my family and experiences with friends. As I did so, I felt tension that I had been unaware of leave my body. All because of mindfulness. Consider using mindfulness the next time you feel negativity taking over your mind. Take the time to consider what you are thinking, and, if needed, change it to optimize your day. You will be glad you did. “Watch your thoughts, they become your words; watch your words, they become your actions; watch your actions, they become your habits; watch your habits, they become your character; watch your character, it becomes your destiny.” ― Lao Tzu
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